Church and Fat guy

Ok so My religoin is SDA, which basically means i attend a five hour mass on saturdays. So this saturday my sister was going to present her baby to the church. Little did i know this was going to be the WORST church mass in my life. My day started off badly when mikey (my dog) decided he was going to jump on my freshly ironed shirt. On the way to church i find out that i am going to be the god-father and im going to have to stand in front od the church and pray ( i HATE standing up in fornt of church). Anyway i get there and use the bathroom, when i come back everyone has a seat on one side of the church, so i have to go to the other side to find a seat. There was only one seat open and for some odd reason (at the time) the whole row was empty except for this one fat lady. Me, never going to this haitian church before, didnt think there was anything wrong with this woman. so i take a seat right next to her. I look around and people in the church are smirking at me, one girl even pointed and laughed. Im just thinking what the fuck? ok so service continues and the Pastor is doing is thing, you know getting everyone revved up to praise the lord. He says in creole "jesus knows what your thinking all the time", and i would soon find out my big mistake. All of a sudden i hear a loud, ear peircing, head shaking yell from this Fat lady. AMEN!!! im like Fuckkkk this lady better not do this the whole time....well she did. Five minutes later another AMEN!!!! and then another and another. As longer the pastor spoke the higher the rate of AMEN!!!! increased. (bringing me to a brilliant equation.....Fat fucking lady + haitian pastor= ARPM or Amen rate per minute) At one point this aldy Screamed AMEN!!!! 15 times in one minute. Mind you im sitting right next to her and she Yelling AMEN!!!! right in my ear. One time she said A!!!!!!......waited a couple fo second and said MENNN!!!! i was like WTF!???. Finalyy she got up to go use the bathroom and i made a run for it, i ddint even bother looking for another seat i just stood up in the back. At this point i thought i was free but then i had to go stand in front of the church to do the baby presentaiton thing. so im going back to stand then this aldy has the nerve to tell me "come on baby sit down and lets praise god"....i was like nooooo. I didnt wanna look like a jerk in fornt of the ENTIRE church so i sat next to the fat ass and before i could even sit down.....AMENN!!!!!!!! :Sigh: when church was over i was so happy. It was definetly the worst church experience of my life...i couldnt even enjoy some little kid getting beat for playing his PSP cause this fat lady just kept screaming AMEN in my ears. Anyways thanks for listening you guys now heres a video i found of some fat kid dancing i hope you enjoy

First Official Post :-)

Alright, i believe that it would be the best gesture for me to introduce myself befroe starting off my blog career. My name is Curtis Dabel, I am 18 years old, and this blog will be about alot of random things. Whether tis funny things that happen to me during the day or just something i thought of while i was bored in class. By the way...I can NOT spell if my life dpended on it so please folks give me a break.


Now then i had a tough time deciding what my first blog post would be about. I decided i would discuss 7 things that i do or about me that people may dispise me for.

8
My chin
I know for about 80% of you that know me the FIRST thing you said to yourself when you saw me in rela life was...."Wow this kid has a Huge Chin" or "look at the size of this guys chin!" or "man this fucking guy is so fucking sexy and his Big Chin just make him look even sexier". Yes i know for most of you (females) it was that last one but yes i know my chin is SLIGHTLY larger than a regular humans. I feel that we should just stop making fun of my chin or looking at it and just embrace Curtis.Y.Dabel as the great person he is instead :).

7
Random text/Instant messages.
If you are my friend you may or may not have experience at least one random text/Instant messages. These may vary from "hey you sexy fuck!","You are so beautiful","Worthog",and my favorites anything that has to do with arbor day. If i do this i do this to put a smile on your face. I like putting smiles on peoples face esp if your are my friend. So if i do this dont say "ughh curtis that big chinned asshole" no instead say " awww curtis that big chinned hunk of man" (not if ur a guy...say sumthing else)

6
My sudden angry outburst's
These usually occur during a competetive game of some sort (madden, nba 2k9, dominos, etc). I do this because i hate losing guys. Im sorry, i also think that i have a slight anger managment problem but that only occurs when i am playing video games. So if i have ever scared you in any kind of manor i am sorry.

5
My laughter
Ok if you are my friend or even an acquaintance, you know that have one of the MOST , if not the most unique laughs that you have ever heard in your life. I have no idea why i laugh like this and to be honest i am often embarassed to laugh. I often cover my mouth to prevent people form hearing my loud outbursts. Even that sometime isnt enough :-(. If i could change one thing about me it might be my laugh.

4
My Hand Writing
As Shown in the Image above, i have the worst hand writing in my family. I have also been told by a professor that i have the worst hand writing she has ever seen in herlife (<----fine bitch...). Well this is cause form the Unorthodox way i position my pen and/or pencil in my hand while writing. Because of this i was given a set of various "grip-pens" so that i could correct the position of the hand on my pen. these pens were good for nothing except being made fun of in fifth grade for having to write with these pens. my hand writing has not improved since fifth grade. To be honest i some times try to correct my hand writing on spare time.

3
My masturbating star Pictures
I think its hillarious

2
Words that i make up
The following is a list of words that i have made up in the past year
Goude...meaning...good.
Smutas...meaning...smuts, sluts, hoe's, ho's, hoars, mistresses, and prostitues.
Bomba-Fuck...meaning...a combinations of the word "bombacluat"which is a Jamaican patois meaning blood clot and "Fuck" which is an american english word meaning....fuck. Usually said when i want to say bombacluat but i say bombafuck instead.
Bomba-Womba...meaning...when i want to say bomba-fuck but i dont want to curse bomba-womba would usually be said instead.

1
My odd sense of humor.
If you know me you know for a fact that i will laugh at pretty much anything. I once laughed during a spanish exam in high shcool and got my paper taken away. the reason i was laughing was because i thought the way the teacher formated the exam was funny. I dont know why i find certain things funny but i do and WHEN i do i am going to laugh at it.

Thank you guys for reading my first Blog. Please Comment, Follow, and Enjoy.